Repost: Apple is Evil

My involvement in the Exeter Cascade Project and people’s unfathomable enthusiasm for the wares of one late Steve Jobs caused me to post the following on my own personal blog at the time. My opposition to the evil that is Apple knows no bounds, and this dark conspiracy must be exposed! So reposting:

I’ve lately become involved in the University of Exeter’s Cascade project, aimed at promoting ‘digital literacy’, and so have yet again become exposed to people’s enthusiasm for the wares of one late Steve Jobs. I must therefore pin my colours to the mast, and firmly outline my rejection of Apple and the evil therein.

Now there’s a lot of very practical reasons to reject Macs and other Apple products. One might be concerned at the way various Apple programs such as quicktime try to install all the other Apple programs. One might hate the way OS X does everything behind your back. There’s the working conditions at Apple affiliates in China, where nets have been installed to stop the workers from committing suicide. One might also object to the way itunes not only has an overly complex user agreement, but that part of it includes tracking your physical location.

Apples 1984 advert – an aspiration, not a warning

However, in this post I shall be setting aside these otherwise very important issues. No, today I shall outline the theological arguments against Apple, namely the fact that Apple is of the Devil:

1) Apple’s logo in itself contains a valuable clue as to the identity of its backer. Think about it – who would market computers under the logo of an Apple. With a bite taken out of it?

“the woman saw that the tree was good for food, and that it was pleasant to the eyes”

2) A second fact to be considered lies in the Mac operating system, OS X. Regardless of which random big cat it is named after, OS X for certain components has drawn upon and incorporated significant portions of FreeBSD, the free UNIX operating system. And what was FreeBSD’s mascot, I hear you ask. A demon!

OS X: Ginger Tom – now available for only £29.99 and your very soul…

3) Our final piece of evidence lies in Macbooks themselves, and just a simple question that everyone needs to ask themselves. Let’s look at one:

Just ask yourself this question: Laptops with one mouse button… are those the creation of a loving God?

QED.

Fleeing into the wilderness

I despise the word blog. Despite this, this is the third one I’ve kept and the fifth I’ve contributed too, so I might as well get used to it. Since I’m currently involved in the Exeter Cascade Project, and so am contributing to their wordpress blog, I’ve decided to migrate across the great deep into this new promised land. In other words, I think I like wordpress better, and so am moving here and will be migrating some of my earlier posts from blogspot here. The patchy record of my year in Israel might well stay where it is though.

I will cover any and all subjects here as they appear randomly to me, in part to break the horrible affliction of academic writing. However, doing a PhD in Theology and religion is likely to spill across, as is my specific research in the Book of Mormon, so expect to see both topics represented here. I’ll try and break it up.

Final disclaimer: the views expressed in this blog are not representative of any outside party, or even – depending on the level of outrage – that of the author himself.